Generally, what human beings think and do can be traced back to a cluster of habits formed during his/her early childhood. Then that will mean that we are our habits. Maybe that could explain why it is so difficult to change or stop our ways. Relationships of people are also impacted, hugely, by these.
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EHC tries to bring about certain common bad habits that can adversely affect any relationship, especially between spouses, and how we can deal with those habits. EHC encourages all its readers to discuss with your partner about such bad habits, if there are any. These habits may seem trivial to many, but it is these very habits that could go from a minor annoyance to a big reason for a break up soon enough if you don’t keep an eye on them.
Taking for granted
You know your partner is sweet and caring. And you love them for it. But do you remember to appreciate your partner and thank them for all the little things they do. You may think it is silly to constantly thank your partner for every little thing they do. But chances are, you may start taking these sweet gestures for granted even before you realize it, and they would turn into expectations instead.
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You try really hard to please your partner, but you get really upset when your partner doesn’t realize you have done something for them. And yet, you continue to do nice things for them all the time which they take for granted.
If your partner takes you for granted, talk to them about it. Bottling your rage or sadness will not help you. Perhaps, your partner didn’t even realize that you have done something sweet for them.
Testing your partner
You intentionally make big demands or throw tantrums just to see if your partner cares enough to go the extra mile for you. These petty tests are rather common at the start of a new relationship when you would want your lover to prove their love for you, but don’t carry this habit into the later stages of love or your constant games and tests would annoy your lover.
Blame games
Do not put the fault entirely on your partner if you believe you have a small role to play too. It is easy to point a finger and accuse your partner for the mess that both of you are in. But by doing that, your partner would feel cornered and helpless, and even angry and hurt. On the other hand, by sharing the blame or acknowledging your role in the mistake, you would be giving your partner the emotional support they so badly need at that moment.
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Silent treatment
Do you choose to ignore your partner instead of talking about something that has hurt you? You are not alone. Many men and women would rather sit down in the corner and stare at the ceiling than answer their partner when they are annoyed for some reason. Never do that because you would only end up hurting your partner, make them feel miserable, and hate you at the same time.
Monosyllables
Don’t answer in monosyllables in the middle of a conversation. Answering with a ‘yes’, ‘no’ or an ‘hmmm’ is just a rude thing to do, even if you are pretending to be concentrating on something else.
When your partner tries to communicate with you, try to answer back in open-ended questions. It will help both of you interact better and understand each other better.
Making a scene in public
Do not yell at your partner or humiliate them in public or when someone else is around. Your frustrations may be valid and you may have every good reason to accuse your partner of something, or walk away from them. But ridiculing your partner or hurting them in public will do a lot of damage to their ego, and that is something that won’t heal very soon.
Time for friends
Do you subconsciously nag your partner or get annoyed with them when they leave you alone and go out with their own friends? This is pretty common, and there is a good chance you feel it if your partner has more friends than you do or if you are a loner. But remember, hanging out with friends now and then is not all bad. It gives both of you the kind of space you both need to grow as individuals.
Nagging too much
Many studies have pointed to nagging as being the number one factor that makes men dissatisfied with their relationships. Don’t nag your partner. Remember that your partner doesn’t have to do things according to your timeline and nagging will only make the situation worse.
Not taking care of yourself
You aren’t going to be a good partner unless you take care of yourself. The best partners are people who care for their emotional, physical, and spiritual health. Take care of yourself so you can give to your relationship.
Telling “white lies”
One of the worst relationship habits is lying. Even those little white lies can seriously damage your relationship. Whether you aren’t honest about how much you spent on a shopping trip or where you went last, it can destroy the relationship.
Focusing on your happiness only
Too often, people focus on what they are gaining from the relationship rather than focusing on what they are giving. Whether you are happy or not, you need to put some effort into making your partner happy.
Keeping score
Don’t keep score about who earned what or whose turn it is next. Instead, focus on working together as a team to do what’s best for the relationship.
Sometimes, it is easy to assume these are trivial details that are not a big deal. But if you continue with these bad relationship habits for more than a few months, it is only a matter of time before your partner would end up getting frustrated with your behavior. So, why wait until things turn worse and ugly. Go ahead, change your ways, and show your love!
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Image courtsey: torontosun.com , infobae.com , teenradio.com.mk
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