Let’s face it. Some men avoid their partner while she is menstruating and they feel it is more of a help if they just stay out of the way. Irritable, irrational, moody and prone to erratic behavior – are a few words men usually use to describe their wives during “that” time of the month. Here is the wakeup call! Men should realize that they should be supportive and caring towards their wives, instead of running away.
Realize what a woman goes through during her period. Obviously men can’t put themselves in the place of a woman and understand what it is like to have a menstrual cycle, but they can try to understand what symptoms they go through. Women usually get terrible stomach cramps, which are never fun, and can range from a dull pain that simply annoys, to a stabbing pain that practically paralyses a woman. Their mood swings, they can get headaches, restlessness, become extremely tired or sleepy, become sore in their genital regions, and their appetites can dramatically change. Symptoms will vary from woman to woman and some women may not even have symptoms at all! Periods are just generally uncomfortable and the symptoms that go along with it are never any fun. So men folk, hopefully this will help give you an idea of what a woman goes through during her menstrual cycle.
So, here are a few things that you can do during your wife’s periods to keep her at ease and earn some brownie points for yourself too.
Be open about periods
The biggest mistake men commit is that they are not open about periods; so much so that they stubbornly refuse to say the name aloud. “That time of the month” or “problem days” is not how you should be referring to the periods. It is something your wife will be going through till she turns 50. So, you better get used to referring to periods by its name rather than using euphemisms. Make a banana shake for your wife. Bananas contain potassium which relieves menstrual cramps. Also, make sure she has a hot water bottle handy, which would relieve her of the abdominal pain and backache.
Talk to her
First of all, understand that women undergo a lot of hormonal imbalances during their menstrual cycle and they can be really moody. If your wife seems to be too cranky or irritable, then understand it is not her fault; it is the hormones talking! So, you must talk to her and most importantly be patient and calm. Pay attention to her diet. Make sure she avoids caffeine during this time. Make a nice ginger tea for her. Your thoughtful actions are as important as your comforting words.
Women do not like to be treated as invalids during their periods. They can work perfectly well and finish all the work. But, every woman would love it if her husband did something for her. Something as small as running the washing machine on your own, clearing up the table after dinner or making a cup of tea for her in the evenings, etc., and these will make her feel special. Become a sweet and caring helper around the house. Try to do some simple household chores like getting groceries, cleaning the dishes, or helping her with cooking.
Periods have the power to rake up all her locked-up insecurity issues. During this time, women prefer to roam around in comfortable clothing. They do not want to be bothered about how they look. It is your job to make her feel beautiful. You don’t have to be too obvious about it. No need to shower a dozen of flowers suddenly, one simple rose will suffice. Compliment her subtly every day. You could also get her favorite chocolate or simply say “I love you” before leaving for office. This will put her in a calmer mood.
A long tight hug followed by a kiss on her forehead will work wonders for your wife. Hold her hand while watching TV or regale her with your sense of humor. Offer to massage her feet or her back. Many women often complain about severe body ache. When a person exercises, the body releases a natural painkiller called serotonin. So, take your wife for a long walk or encourage her to perform mild exercises to make her feel better.
Make her feel loved and appreciated. Let her know how happy you are to have her in your life. Tell her she is a great friend, girlfriend, or wife. If she’s at work or away from you, call her cell phone, work phone, or email her and tell her how beautiful, sweet and all-round awesome she is. It is not even describable how nice it is for a person to do this.
Make her calm
Remember that she is very emotional, so don’t take her action to heart but know and expect that she will take everything to heart. Never be rude and tell her “You’ll get over it”. If she is in extreme agony, leave her alone. Sometimes there is nothing you can do about her pain and being there might just make it worse. Comfort her later on when the pain has eased off a bit. Ask her what she prefers.
Remember to be patient and understanding. If things get too out of hand, take a deep breath, and leave the room to cool off.
Don’t make any joke about periods and PMS.
Let her fall asleep in your arm; skin-to-skin contact with someone she cares about is an excellent psychological relief. Just remember that you have to be understanding and sometimes be willing to bite your tongue. It doesn’t mean you should avoid her, but menstruation is very taxing on the body, mind and is triggered by flares of hormones. It is possible she might be more sensitive to things you say or do, especially things that would not normally trigger negative emotions.
If nothing else works, here is the most important thing you can say to her, “How can I help you?” …only she will know what you can do to make her feel best!